Can I handle change?

Change is something that happens to us on a daily basis. We do not feel much about the changes that affect our lives in this way because most of the time they happen in subtle, almost unnoticeable ways. But they are changes anyway. Think about it, how many times do we find that the waiter or waitress at our favourite restaurant is different, and yet we had struck a good rapport with the one that has just left? Does this do anything at all to our lives and the custom of eating at this particular place or is it something that we can dismiss as of no consequence? Though we ignore such a change, it has a bearing on something in our lives no matter how insignificant it may be.

It is the bigger more effective changes that we all abhor. Changes that disrupt routine and the comforts that we are already used to. It is from these bigger changes that we get the words "nobody likes changes" . Is it the changes that we hate, or is it the discomfort that we can not stand?

If we were to deal with the issue of good changes, that is, changes that improve major areas of our live e.g. work, families, relationships etc, we realize that we will always attempt to resist the change even when it is for our good. Imagine a change that for example removes alcohol and drugs from our family settings, yet almost everyone attests to how difficult it can be to embrace such changes. And yet, if one were to mention a change for the better to anyone's financial situation, the receipient will always leap with joy and eagerness at this prospect. What then is it that causes any resistance or procrastination to change?

What would the results be?
The financial change is easily acceptable because we all know what we can do with a little more money than we have. We can already visualize and appreciate the future with more to spend - maybe because we dream of it daily. Any change that we have not visualized in the future tense remains unknown to us and is difficult to embrace. We are simply unprepared for it both psychologically and physically. It is true therefore to say that the human being can deal with any change - they need only be prepared.

Getting ready.
Each person is best prepared for change when they get to discover what is the most effective way of implementing change. Someone once told me that if he needed to change or pick a habit, he only stuck to the new habit that he desires for 10 straight days. Another suggests a month of religious observation of what we want to achieve and it's done. We can appreciate then that its all about different strokes for different folks. But certain ingredients seem to be necessary for any style of change to be meaningfully effective:

• First, we must consult our personal constitution. We must determine beyond any doubt, exactly what we want for ourselves. This is the spiritual part and that which governs our private universe.
  
• It is necessary to have a motivating factor in the endeavor. While our first step can be a sufficient motivation, the end product should be a good energizer. Remember the example of an improved financial situation?
• We must manage the particular change. Like all good managers we must have a workable plan that is easy or comfortable for us to follow.
• Try this one out! Reward yourself once the change is in place. Of course the idea is to come up with the reward at the beginning of the process and to actually award it to ourselves once we succeed.

If like me you are a change person (or one who only recently decided to make changes), it is always an additional boost to tackle the small changes and use them to graduate to bigger ones. I just don't know how anyone manages to leave civilization and re-locate to some remote village with no running water or electricity - that is major!

One last word, if we try one way of achieving change and it fails for us, we must go right back and try another. If we persist, we end up discovering that which best suits us.

What really is purpose

Today, a friend posed a fairly good question to me and I would like to post what my specific reply to him was. I understand that different people will have different answers to this same question but that is the healthy part. I consider different answers healthy because I am in the process of learning and am looking forward to the time that there will only be one answer for me - the time that I will not stop to consider anything else except that which has become the real answer for me.

I told my inquiring friend that for me purpose primarily means two important things:

• That we have within us (at any point in life) something of value that we need to release into the world.
• That the world (and mostly human beings) are in need of that which is within us. Indeed they are always in the process of waiting for it to be released to them.

Further discussions gave us the enlightenment that most of the frustrations that we feel are really our inner beings begging for what is inside to be released as well as those around us demanding that we do the just thing and fill their lives with the good that lies in us. This reminded me of an observation that someone made saying that if we know that we are withholding what belongs to others, this should drive us into action, to fulfill our purpose on this earth - if only we can realise that we do others a great deal of injustice when we remain inactive in as far as our purpose is concerned.

After all, we are everyday enjoying the work of other people in music, books, lectures etc. Why then do we hoard?

With or without a life purpose

It all begins with some kind of personal constitution. That deeper inner self that knows where the lines are drawn and what the lines are about. We all need to put limits beyond which we cannot and will not venture. We must build a foundation upon which all else is built. The foundation must be solid and sound.

In human terms, this kind of foundation can only be found in spirituality. Deep spiritual beliefs are possibly the only solid and sound base that man can build a personal constitution upon - that part of us that remains unchanged regardless of circumstances and happenings. No matter what the situation, our thoughts and actions must remain steadfastly bound to these beliefs.

Harmony.
This foundation therefore acts as the center. It is this center that then helps to lock all of man's aspects of life into place. It therefore follows that our desires, purpose, needs and abilities must be directed and guided by this center. It is, in seeking harmony in these four areas of our lives, that we finally manage to eliminate conflict within us and arrive at the point where all energy is utilized in pushing towards the achievement of our life's goals.

But it would not be fitting at this stage, not to stress the fact that the rather difficult and energy sapping activity of setting goals and planning how to achieve them, must take deep root for us to realize any kind of progress. I will try to examine my own experiences on the issues of planning at a later stage.

In the absence of harmony.
Without a purpose, we only manage to achieve much of nothing, and especially so when we use goals and plans in that state of confusion in our lives. We achieve nothing because our everyday busyness does not necessarily lead us to any destination although it is quite possible to stumble into certain levels of successes that bring us into close contact with our true purpose. Even when we so stumble accross our true purpose, we fail to recognize it and therefore continue in our original state without a realization in the world. We must therefore take definite steps to seek our purpose diligently in order that we may take charge of our very lives.

The fight within

Truly, deep inside, we all know how our lives ought to be running. The human soul longs for harmony and peace for it knows quite well that it should be so. From the external, come numerous forces that are seemingly determined to ensure that the expected peace and calm is never achieved.

The role of guaranteeing some form of order lies squarely on the individual. Once man realises this, then man must depart on the adventure of self discovery and self improvement. Such improvement of self is the only known remedy for bringing the desired balance in the inside. The adventure is quite interesting - indeed, it can easily be made into a fulltime activity - and why not, the heart is known to be the wellspring of life. If we can spend more time sharpening the inside, then most of the other issues that otherwise keep us busy day in day out would become non-issues. We well know that certain beliefs confine their people into a lifetime of this kind of search and development - surely, it must be well worth it.

I must admit that in my own search and development, I have come to appreciate that the human being is capable of taking full control and care of every aspect of life. What then would the issues that are oftenly considered as being out of control be? I would not be talking about birth, time of birth or death but exactly that which lies in between.

The good thought encourages me to question the things that cause man frustrations and the sense of defeat. Do we bring such things upon ourselves? I dare say YES.

Building Blocks

Interesting. That really, is what life is.

I have found it strange that everything about life, whether turmoil or calm, comes right from within us. It is all there for us to mine and present to the world. Indeed, this is the very essence of the life of every human being.

Even stranger is the fact that as human beings we can never agree on this issue. Many are the times when we will put our foot down and argue about what is true and what is not. Yet who knows, maybe we all do not even exist - "its just an illusion!". Personally, I think that we actually do exist, and that, for a reason. I think it true therefore, to suggest that there are many versions of the observations that will be contained in this blog - or shall we say that my within is not your within? And yet, there exists universal laws that affect all of us in the same way, and so we might agree albeit reluctantly, that there exists some sameness in us all.

In this blog I will attempt as much as I can, to mine that which is within me (it is plenty) and post it here. Who knows, it might trigger something positive in the life of another. And maybe still, it might help me to leave that which is within me right here in this world, where it really belongs.